Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Spring Cleaning

A new month, a new season, a new year, a new semester, a new fancy gym membership and a new outlook. Having a birthday, attending a friend's wedding and spending some time alone has been really refreshing in a way.  I feel more like myself than I have in months.  I remembered some lessons.  I remembered that I'm the happiest when I'm active and accomplishing goals.  That I can be happy alone.  That life really is amazing. 

So it's time to start running again.  Time to break up my monotonous work and head downstairs to the gym to release steam, clear my head and shed the (ahem) weight of the world.  A new killer gym membership wasn't necessarily the most fiscally responsible decision I've ever made, but I'm ever so glad I did it.  I consider good health and the good mood it brings an investment.  And frankly, a lot cheaper than a therapist.

The days are getting longer and the evenings are getting warmer.  There's a reason people equate spring and summer with love and romance.  It's the time of the year when the earth renews itself and comes alive.  I may sound like a Real Housewife, but I too am anxious to renew myself. It's time to clean away my demons, or at least pack them up and put them away in the back of the closet or under the bed, where they clearly belong.

I have a tendency to be my own worst enemy.  I can let my moods spiral out of control and lose myself.  My stubbornness and willfulness can get in the way of my own happiness.  I've realized that sometimes you have to let life happen.  Because I've been feeling a little stuck lately, my anxiety was pushed into overdrive.  Needlessly I tell ya.  Needlessly.  Because I'm OK.  I'm doing just fine.  Excellent in fact.  Because classes start again this week ;)

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