Wednesday, October 20, 2010

Faith

I grew up a good Catholic girl,  so I was always aware of the necessity of faith.  But only in a spiritual/God sort of way.  It's only recently that I discovered the necessity of faith in ourselves. 

If going back to school, living by myself, being single and thousands of miles away from my family has taught me anything, its that we have to believe in ourselves. I wouldn't be doing all of this if I didn't truly believe somewhere deep down that the countless lonely hours of studying, being in class and toiling away in my cubicle was going to massively change my life. 

But in the middle of the tunnel, ten months away from graduation, I'm going a little crazy.  I'm wondering exactly how this is going to work out and indeed, if it is all worth it in the end.  I'm slugging through a job, in a city, that at times feels like its killing me.  Time is flying and I want it both to slow down and just hurry up already.  It's just eleven weeks until the new year and two weeks from signing up for my second to last semester of business school.  In a sentiment I've echoed before, all these changes are so bittersweet. 

I'm mentally ready to move on, whether that's to a different job, city, routine or relationship. I've been scouting jobs in Chicago with more fervor lately and I'm trying to really get out of my cocoon for a while and enjoy the company of my friends.  And while change is scary, I'm ready for whatever that means in the next year. 

I need to not only have faith in myself and my capabilities, but faith that it will all work out as it's meant to be.  I've always been of the attitude that I should follow my gut, work hard and good things will come.  I don't know that it's always served me, but I really do believe that things happen for a reason and that I'm meant to be exactly where I am right now. 

As in running, or any other monumental endeavor, results aren't always visible at first.  If one can make it through all this hard work and unknown, the rest will seem a whole lot easier. 

1 comment:

Michael said...

This applies to your last two posts.

“Do you know how to make God laugh? Tell him your plans”. This has been one of my favorite joke for many years. It is not the biggest laugher, but perhaps the most meaningful and poignant. Trust me. I know.

Faith in God and ourselves comes and goes. For many of us, as we get older they both grow. But for many in their twenties or so, there is less need for God. They are doin3g everything on their own.

Perhaps more importantly, like so many others, I have faith in you. You are beautiful, smart, charming, independent and so much more. Whenever you have doubts just call one of your friends. We will restore your faith.

Michael