I forgot about this. I forgot how hard these weekends are. Sundays aren't particularly fun around here, but today's been particularly difficult. It's finals week again and I've been procrastinating all day by ironing, cooking and feeling sorry for myself. Our marketing paper and presentation are due Wednesday and I have a daunting 20 chapter finance final on Thursday. Guess who's gonna need a stiff drink with her girl friends Friday night?! Guess who really needs a hug right now?!
Even when I had a roommate, this wasn't easy. Being forced to do something alone (studying for finance and writing a presentation) for an extended period of time is frustrating. It's been so great to have a particular marketing classmate around this semester; I never had to study or write alone. He was always just a call/text/BBM/email away and I knew that he was in just as much pain (if not more) than me. He made me smile. Hopefully we'll have another class or two together next year, but my window of opportunity for spending this much time with him is pretty much over. So while I'm excited to officially be halfway done with my MBA, the end of this particular semester is a tad bittersweet.
Last semester at this time I had just ended all contact with the roadie. I feel like I'm in a constant state of transition. From one relationship to another, one semester to the next... I've never had consistency in my life and I don't know that I would know what to do with it if it smacked me in the face. I'm in a much better place this semester and part of me is actually looking forward to the fall, but I'm mourning the passing of time as much as anything else.
The good news is that some things are falling into place. I need to remember that things do really happen when they're meant to and are never what we expect. I've said it before, but the more I try to control the universe around me, the more miserable I am and the more miserable I make everyone around me. Letting go of some things is hard, but it's key. Taking it all one day at a time would prove to be better for my mental health I'm sure.